We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty. —Maya AngelouBreaking free of our comfort zones challenges us to expand our range of spiritual understanding and stimulate growth. Perhaps an apt visual metaphor for such an expansion is the dispersal of a shipment of rubber duckies around the world’s waterways. In 1992, a Chinese freighter accidently dropped a crate of thirty thousand rubber duckies into the Pacific Ocean, which were later discovered on the coasts of Indonesia, Australia, South America, Alaska, the Arctic, and England, resulting in scientists gaining a better understanding of ocean currents. Metaphorically, their geographical movement can be seen as a means for breaking free of our comfort zones and trusting the current of life to carry us forward, enabling us to more fully develop our spiritual potential and contribute to a greater good in the future.
We often become fixated on how others perceive and define us, and try to remain within limited parameters for fear of making mistakes, failing, or disappointing them because we desperately want their approval. But such behavior diminishes our sense of self-worth, limits our ability to make discerning choices, and undermines trust in our own experiences or the voice of our spirit to guide us in realizing our true potential. There is nothing enlightened about inhibiting ourselves so that others feel secure or fulfilled while we feel “shrink-wrapped.”
When we are able to do this, we no longer feel we have to “hustle for our worthiness,” as Brené Brown states. “When we can let go of what other people think and own our own story,” she says, “we gain access to our worthiness—the feeling that we are enough just as we are and that we are worthy of love and belonging. When we spend a lifetime trying to distance ourselves from the parts of our lives that don’t fit with who we think we’re supposed to be, we stand outside of our story and hustle for our worthiness by constantly performing, perfecting, pleasing, and proving. Our sense of worthiness—that critically important piece that gives us access to love and belonging—lives inside our story.”
Following is an example of breaking free of our comfort zones. Last October I traveled to Santa Fe, New Mexico, and took my first class in NIA, a sensory-based movement practice that incorporates dance, martial arts, and healing arts. Originally, I was going to stay in my comfort zone by going to a yoga class; however, I wanted to experience my vulnerability, and taking the NIA class turned out to be a good motivator. As we began to move, my first thoughts were, “Am I doing this right?” and “Do I look like a fool?” I compared myself to everyone else, immediately felt five years old, and moved to the back of the room where I thought no one could view me before realizing there were floor-to-ceiling mirrors along the wall, enabling others to easily see me.
At this point, the teacher asked us to break out of our usual movements, calling out, “Are you doing anything new? Are you doing the same hippie arms? Are you staying in one place?” Of course, I was doing the same hippie arms in the same place, stuck in my habitual movements and afraid to transcend my comfort zone. Then summoning my courage I opened my heart and said to myself, “Oh, what the heck. Just trust yourself, Deb.” I surrendered to my inner dancer, experiencing a freedom I had never felt before on the dance floor and discovering a way to express myself that better reflected my authentic self.
Like stepping outside the yellow tape outlining the body at a crime scene, we step outside the confines of our comfort zones to express who we truly are. We don’t think our way into becoming our authentic selves but rather love our way there. When we love ourselves enough, we courageously move toward what we fear and allow ourselves to let go of unhealthy patterns; break free of our familiar habits of resistance, avoidance, and control; and embrace change as a mantra for our lives.
Yes! We need to experience our vulnerability in order to grow. Great posting about stepping out of your comfort zone and I enjoyed reading your examples.
Good reminder, Debra. It certainly is an area that requires constant awareness, because it’s so easy to slip back into the usual, ‘safe’ way of doing things.
Yes! Surrender to your inner dancer in all of life!! 😉
When I step out of my comfort zone is when I feel the most alive!
I always enjoy your posts. Today I especially appreciated the imagery: the yellow tape, the rubber duckies, your ‘hippie arms.’ Maybe yellow is “your color”? 😉 Thanks, Debra
Debra, I love your story about the NIA class. I have only been to a few classes but I love it and empathize with the challenge of letting go and taking the risk of being seen. Your post invites me to think about where I am sitting in my comfort zone right now and where I need to step out and play bigger. Thank you!!
Another lovely post, Debra! I know that I’m still trapped inside of myself, holding my inner dancer back. But let me say this much, I’m working hard to break free! Thanks for the inspiration!
“There is nothing enlightened about inhibiting ourselves so that others feel secure or fulfilled while we feel “shrink-wrapped.”
And there it is. (You buried the lead…LOL)
Total truth baby!
And I think I would LOVE the NIA class!! dance, martial arts, healing arts…Oh Yeah!
xox
Peggy
This post is very inspirational and brought some stuff up for me! I wouldve picked the yoga class and your experience really shows how by picking the other you experienced expansion and self growth (and had fun too!) 🙂 Love it!
I love the quote by Angelou! If we don’t admit them how can we appreciate the changes? I love the personal experience you add to your post.
Thanks for this great inspiration! Interestingly, after a lifetime of stepping outside of my comfort zone I truly enjoyed the last few years within it… Recently I started feeling a calling to move on in a new way (traveling alone)… and am surprised how different it feels…
Great post, Debra! I’ve struggled with this… not so much stepping out of my comfort zone.. but in not caring what people think. There are days i have it mastered and moments I seem to forget who I am. Thankfully, i recognise those moments and they are short-lived these days. Thank you for this beautiful reminder to just be.. and to love me.
I love being a reminder for you to just be and love your beautiful being. You are such a brilliant light…see it and know it I your heart of hearts. Love and blessings